The New Zeitgest

This afternoon, after a long and strenuous campaign trail that seems to have started in 1987, Barack Obama will be sworn in as President of the United States.

I've long been uncertain of Obama's track record in public office, so I've approached this day with trepidation. I don't know if Obama is the right man for the job or not, but it seems to me that a large percentage of the American public deeply, truly believes that he is. And considering where our country's mindset is right now, that may be much more important. So regardless of what his actual intentions are, the belief that his plans are good and his directions infallible may be a more important factor in jump-starting the economy and bringing a politically divided country together than whether his plans are good or how far off course he ends up. He is, it seems, the man for the hour. The best of luck to him.

But if I read one more article explaining how Obama will personally change our entire culture by virtue of his incredible awesomeness, I will slam my head into a wall and hope I black out until the press' honeymoon with Obama is over (sometime around 2014, I'm guessing). Have you noticed how many reporters are pledging that they'll treat Obama the same as Bush and will be unafraid to "ask the tough questions?" It's always that exact line. I even heard David Gregory say it, and I honestly can't imagine anything less likely than Gregory treating Obama and Bush the same. I am more likely to win a boxing match with the Jolly Green Giant this Thursday than Gregory to treat Obama the same as Bush next year.

I read an article in the same issue of EW that I was mocking earlier where they explained how Obama being president would make everyone more patriotic, more hip to culture - though comedy will probably take a hit now that there's nothing available to mock (pssst - I can think of something). It also included this remarkable quote, which I will write down verbatim and then move on past without making any commentary.

"'Bad presidents usually mean good music and vice versa,' frets Steve Martin, head of Nasty Little Man, the publicity firm that reps Radiohead and Beck. 'Reagan gave us some of the best indie rock. Nirvana's Nevermind came out during Bush [Sr]. During the Clinton years, though, we got champagne-drenched hip-hop videos, nü-metal, and electroclash. I worry abou the quality of music that may be ushered in by a positive Obama presidency.' Aside form the Dixie Chicks, there can't be a whole lot of happy country artists at the moment, either. After eight years of rocking hte base of the Republican party in power, they're now on the outside looking in. Suddenly they're the counterculture. Maybe that will make for some darker country sounds in years to come.

Speaks for itself, doesn't it?

Okay, I will make one comment: 80's music sucked. The 80's were terrible. Indie rock barely existed in the 80's, everyone was too busy playing their Aha cassettes on their Walkmans. If we have to blame Reagan for something, let's blame him for Bananarama. It happened on his watch, and we all had to deal with it.

As a corollary, I'll point out that a google search for "Barack Obama Zeitgeist" turns up 669,000 results, while "Barack Obama Zeitgest" and "Barack Obama Zeitgiest" both turn up 1.34 million.

I guess that sorta says it all right there.

"Obama tries being a regular guy for a while longer."

Good for him.

Also, I will get very tired of this "what kind of a puppy is Obama getting?" story very, very quickly. Though, if I have to weigh in (and I have to), as a good Democrat who just won a landslide victory, nothing would be more appropriate than to head to the pet cemetery and clone the remains of Him and Her. LBJ plus cloning, it's like a two-fisted punch to the Republican face. I don't know what that would look like.

Or, just get a bulldog and put lipstick on it. That'll show 'em.

Hulk No Vote! Hulk Smash Things!

Someone polled comic book writers to see which candidate each superhero would vote for. Sounds fun, right? Except, of course, the writers really just said the candidate that they would vote for and ascribed it to those characters. So, while it is perhaps likely that Tony Stark (Iron Man) would vote Obama, it seems less likely that Bruce Banner (The Hulk), John Constantine, and all of the X-Men would as well. In fact, it appears that virtually every superhero would vote for Obama, with the Punisher voting for Bob Barr (because he doesn't play by the rules!) and a couple voting for Nader, while McCain and Cynthia McKinney each snagged one vote apiece.

This brings me to my final election question - I have read hundreds of Obama endorsements by bands and movie stars and magazines and web sites and goodness knows what else, and I have read exactly one noteworthy McCain endorsement: Heidi Montag.

So, is there anything, absolutely anything, less cool than endorsing John McCain?

McCain-Obama Debate Live Reactions

All times Central.

8:07 Brokaw asks McCain who he'd nominate for Treasury Secretary. McCain quips "not you, Tom. Sorry." Probably the last life of the night. And not a big laugh.

8:10 McCain is going after Obama.

8:14 Obama says "I've got to correct some of McCain's history. Not surprisingly." McCain starts force-laughing. Man, they're gonna be gunning at each other tonight.

8:14 Obama wants to make Warren Buffet Treasury Secretary and thanks him for his support. Shedding that celebrity label, eh Barack?

8:15 Obama stops pointing fingers for a moment to say "you don't want to see politicians pointing fingers."

8:17 New Drinking Game: Drink every time McCain says "croneyism."

8:20 New Drinking Game: Drink every time Obama puts Bush and McCain in the same sentence.

8:21 McCain almost said "maverick" but didn't quite.

8:22 "Pork-barrel!" Everybody drink.

8:25 McCain said "clean coal technology" and Obama visibly flinched. I think he wanted to hit him on it, but he doesn't get to because of the rules.

8:26 Drink every time Brokaw reminds the candidates about the rules.

8:27 Obama sent out an aide to check the gas prices in the area. Smart.

8:27 Brokaw motioned Obama to wrap up and he smacked him down. "Just one point I want to make, Tom." Ooooooh.

8:27 Brokaw reminds everyone about the rules! Everyone drinks!

8:28 There's a question about sacrifice and the American Dream. Obama's gotta be breathing a sigh of relief that McCain is going first. You never want to go before the Vietnam vet.

8:29 McCain spends no time on sacrifice and the American Dream and instead talks about earmarks for two minutes. The message being "no sacrifice needed! I've got this under control. Elect me!"

8:30 Obama invokes 9-11. This is either a kill punch or a huge mistake.

8:31 It's neither. Obama reminds everyone how terribly Bush did during the 9-11 crisis. Weirdly, that's not how I remember it.

8:32 Obama's now talking about energy incentives. Do you get the sense that both candidates have only two or three issues they're going after tonight?

8:33 Woah, rules comment! Everybody drink!

8:33 Brokaw asks a question with Bush in the question. Little bit of a softball there.

8:34 Obama defended earmarks. He probably shouldn't have mentioned that earmarks are 18% of the federal budget. That is not helping.

8:35 McCain just invoked both Herbert Hoover and Protectionism. No one there has any idea what he's talking about.

8:37 I like Obama's little head twitch whenever he can't respond. It's killing him not to say anything.

8:37 Woah! Take eight drinks! What happened there? Obama tried to respond even though it wasn't his turn, so Brokaw slapped him down, but Obama kept going anyway, so Brokaw started reading a new question anyway. I think Brokaw's getting pissed at Obama's cavalier attitude toward the debate rules.

8:39 Obama has now completely ignored the question and started talking about tax exemptions anyway. Maybe Brokaw will call him on it.

8:40 Obama hits McCain back for his "overhead projector" crack. Saw that coming.

8:40 McCain wants to answer the question and to respond to Obama at the same time. He's so excited he's not sure where to start.

8:41 McCain's getting Mavericky up there.

8:41 Oooh, base closings. Hitting the tough issues.

8:42 No one broke the rules and Brokaw made a rules comment anyway. Take two drinks!

8:43 McCain makes Lieberman reference. Take a drink.

8:43 Am I the only one that thinks that McCain makes it sound like he and Lieberman are perhaps some sort of superhero duo traveling the world proposing alternate energy solutions?

8:45 Obama struggles when he goes first but kills when he goes second.

8:46 Technical director miscuts again. Welcome to prime time, rook.

8:47 Both candidates have this look when the other one is going that says "man, look at this hack dithering away with all this nonsense."

8:47 Huge rules smackdown! Obama takes a potshot. McCain does all but wink at Brokaw. I think he's enjoying that he and Brokaw look like a matched set up there with Obama looking like the odd man out.

8:49 McCain getting cute, he just referred to Obama as "that one." You know that's going to be quoted out of context constantly on MSNBC this week.

8:51 Obama talks health care and only talks about women's issues. Smart.

8:53 I really feel that McCain is winning so far tonight, but I might be too biased to tell. He's certainly extremely well-prepped tonight, and he's throwing heat. But with Obama having a strong lead in economic issues, to undecideds he might look a little desperate more than passionate.

8:55 McCain just booted the health care question. Not good.

8:56 Obama going second on health care is gonna be rough for McCain. He's gonna eat this one up.

8:56 Obama invoked his dead mother. Ooh.

8:57 Obama hints that he thinks it might be possible that John McCain hates children. He's really gunning for him.

8:58 Woah, Obama just took a shot at the great state of Arizona. Don't bring that business up in here, sir.

8:58 New Drinking Game: take two drinks every time Brokaw makes a rules comment and then McCain makes a joke about it.

9:00 "We don't have time for on the job training." Then he turns around and stalks back to the chair. Woah.

9:02 Obama calls McCain a "cheerleader for Bush." That's two drinks.

9:03 Obama says we can't help Darfur until we change John McCain and George Bush's foreign policy. That seems mean of us.

9:05 Darfur reference #2. And wait, the problem is that McCain can't rally international support, but Obama can. Well, he can when he's President. That's when he will receive that magical power.

9:06 McCain wants a cool hand at the tiller. I feel that if you're in charge of steering the boat, you should be allowed gloves.

9:08 McCain just referenced "his hero," Reagan, while also pointing out that he knew more than him about the military. Gutsy.

9:09 Obama might be right. All our problems might really be that we never finished hunting for bin Laden.

9:11 McCain just flip-flopped and said that Teddy Roosevelt is his hero. Reagan or Roosevelt, McCain! Pick a side.

9:12 McCain and Obama can't even agree on how to pronounce "Taliban." Obama pronounces it "TAL-lee-ban" and McCain calls it "TAHL-eh-BAHN."

9:13 Obama just smacked down Brokaw again, and kept going, so much so that Brokaw said "well, I'm just a hired hand here." Someone is not going to be invited to Brokaw's famous Halloween party and bob-for-apples marathon.

9:14 Obama says that McCain calls him "green behind the ears." It does sound like McCain.

9:15 McCain said that he could totally catch bin Laden if he wanted to. He's probably just feeling a little sluggish today, that's all that stopping him.

9:17 Drink every time McCain references General Petraus. That's at least four drinks so far.

9:18 The candidates sound mad at each other. Like, a fight might break out. Quick poll: who's the most likely to hurl their microphone at the other in anger? I think it's tied.

9:19 McCain just said that we're not going to have another Cold War with Russia. Yeah, but that's probably what the last guy said.

9:20 McCain wants to show Georgia "moral support." Just what they're looking for.

9:21 Obama also feels that Georgia could use some moral support. We need to do something about that poor nation's self-esteem.

9:24 Brokaw just asked a "yes or no" question. Nice try.

9:24 McCain said that if he answered "yes" to the question, he would start another Cold War with Russia. The stakes for this debate are high, huh? Also, five minutes ago there was no chance of a cold war, so, this seems like an empty threat.

9:25 McCain just patted an Navy officer in the audience on the shoulder in a decidedly grandfatherly manner. Good work in the Middle East, sonny. Swing by for pinochle sometime.

9:27 Obama went over to the Navy officer to shake his hand, but I think he didn't want to look unoriginal, so he's just standing too close to him, instead.

9:29 Foreign policy is not treating Obama well. He's got his one point ("I hate Iraq. And Bush."), and the rest is a lot of tap dancing. I think he's happy the debate is finally leaving this subject.

9:30 Obama referenced his wife, his grandmother, and his single mother, then swung back and referenced them again. Finish off whatever alcohol you have left.

9:32 The question is "what don't you know?" and both McCain and Obama's answer is "pretty much nothing."

9:34 Oh, a steady hand at the tiller. The guy must've gotten gloves.

9:36 How much does this shaking hands with the audience at the end of the show montage look like the end of SNL each week?

9:40 The "that one" comment is going to be the the story of out this debate. It's gonna be at least three or four news cycles. Guarantee it.

The Secret of Barack Obama's Appeal

Right after the Mets collapsed down the stretch, I was watching ESPN throw it around to various baseball personalities who were explaining how sad and pathetic their swoon was (these same people, had the Mets won one more game, would be referring to the Mets as "resilient" and "gritty"). I can't remember which particularly blase personality was explaining that the Mets collapse was shameful and embarrassing, but he said something that stuck out to me.

Bland-o was saying that the Mets had to make changes, any changes, just because their fans needed to believe that this team could win next year, just because "change means hope." And suddenly Obama's appeal became clear to me.

I remembered growing up as a Sox fan and that complete sense of desperation that slowly crept over you each year as the team would flame out each September. The Yankees lead would be at two games, then three, then five, then seven, and the Indians would start to run away with the wildcard. And suddenly the season would be over, and there'd be that silence, that sad deadness that follows a season when you realize that despite all the time you'd spent convincing yourself that your team had what it took, deep down you always knew that they just weren't quite good enough to make it.

But then there'd be the postseason, and you'd start to believe again. The Sox would send a few prospects away for a talented-but-underachieving second baseman, and Nomar would start talking about how his wrist felt much stronger and he felt his power would be better this year, and all of a sudden no one could stop talking about how the big change was adding Dante Bichette or Shea Hillenbrand or Carl Everett or Reggie Jefferson or whoever our vain hope for that year was. It buoyed you, it brought the life back to talking about your team to friends and cashiers and homeless men on the street (don't ask). We'd believe, once again, that we'd made it over the edge, that we were deserving, that we were contenders, champions, that we had the trappings of greatness.

I think that's why it's so easy to believe in Obama. Nothing he's saying is anything new, it's all the same lines we've always heard. We see that he's clearly a politician through and through, he's strongly Democratic and almost never breaks with his party, he's just a less-experienced version of everything we've seen before, but... there's that newness to him. That sense of excitement. That feeling, creeping over you as you hear talk about him in coffee shop and in line at the supermarket: hey, this might be our year. This might be the time that everything changes. He's gonna be the guy who pushes us over the edge, pushes us to where we've always belonged. Pushes us to greatness. Believe it.

We know that it's probably not true, almost certainly not true, and we're fools for even thinking it. But we just want so badly to believe it, just for the sake of having hope again. We'd rather be fools blindly clinging to hope than doubters scoffing on the edges, we all would. And that's why we choose to believe in Obama.